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More Questions and Answers
From
The Guides, through Ron Scolastico
(PAGE 4)

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The following presents more answers to questions asked in Dr. Ron Scolastico's Study Group Readings or from personal readings, retreats or workshops that have been previously published on the "Timely Wisdom" web page. Dr. Scolastico answers the question from a deep state of consciousness, drawing upon a source of universal wisdom, often referred to as "The Guides." The first set of Questions and Answers (#1-6) can be read here. The second set #7-15) here, and the third set #16-20 here.

21. The experience of loss

 

Would you discuss the experience of loss? As human beings, we experience the loss of something daily—from the simple fact of losing time, losing youth, losing health, leaving family behind after a holiday gathering, to the very painful loss of a loved one through death. It seems that it is the human way to experience loss. Focusing on the moment, “be here now,” seems to work temporarily, but it is hard to maintain that focus. Please discuss the feeling and experience of loss in general. 

For clarity, you must understand that loss is not a reality. It is a human subjective experience. The reality is change.
            Let us say that you have a beloved child. You love the child deeply. The child makes death. The child’s life has ended, so the change is that you no longer have a child. From this, most humans would have a feeling of terrible loss. It is not mandatory to have that feeling of loss, but it is the natural response. However, the only fact is that there has been change. The human child has changed from a living self in a physical body, to an eternal soul.
            If you have a great deal of money invested in the human marketplaces and there comes a certain change, and now your investments are worthless, that is a fact. The experience is a feeling of loss as you say, “I have lost my money.”
            If you are 20 years old and very beautiful, and you love your image physically, and in time you are 65 and wrinkled, and you say, “I have lost my youth,” that is your experience. The fact is that you have changed from a youth to an older person.
            If you wish to avoid loss, then you must avoid change. To avoid change, you need to cease being human and regain your awareness of the eternal in which there is no change, even though there is expansion. Therefore, in the eternal realms, there is never a change that ends something which a human would consider to be a loss. There is no ending in the eternal realm. There is expansion.
            In the human realm, there is always ending. Something begins, then it ends. If you do not like that, you would say, “This is loss. This is painful.” If you lose all of your monies, if your wealth changes to poverty, you do not like that. Theoretically, you could say, “I have had fascinating experience being wealthy, now it is very interesting to be poor.” Then, there would be no feeling of loss. There would be a feeling of excitement about exploring the experience of poverty, which most humans would feel is a negative experience.
            Just as with the area of badness, loss is a human response to change, particularly in the ending of something that you preferred. Now, that something is no longer present, or ongoing, and you feel loss.
            It would not do to try to change your natural human responses. If your child makes death, there is no benefit in trying to force yourself to say, “How interesting. First, I had the experience of having a living child. Now, it is so fascinating to have a dead child. I will try to enjoy this experience.” You would need to have the natural human response to the “loss” of a child, the ending of the child’s physical life. You would need to feel, “This is terrible. This is a terrible loss.” That is the human way, and to try to artificially eliminate those natural responses would make you an unnatural human.
            If you would say, “I am so deeply troubled by loss,” there is benefit in living through the feelings of badness for as long as it takes. Eventually, you could learn not to create those feelings, and you could turn your attention to aspects of life that are not sad and painful.
            There is no other way. You cannot stop change, which some perceive as loss. You can only live with the facts. Your youthful self, if you do not make death, becomes an older self. If you have great monies and they run out, you are poor. It is simply the nature of endings, the nature of change, the nature of human life in the physical world. The only way to avoid loss is to work with feelings of loss, or, to cease being human.
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© Ron Scolastico, Ph.D. 2007